Shen Yu and Qi Fang bought various trinkets at the beach market.
Of course, most of the time, it was Qi Fang doing the shopping. Shen Yu, finding few items of interest, dutifully played the role of shopping companion.
“Let’s bring back some local specialties,” Qi Fang said. “We can’t return empty-handed from our trip.”
Shen Yu had no idea what to do when travelling so he simply nodded and asked, “Do we need to bring many gifts?”
Seeing Shen Yu’s expression, Qi Fang knew he was already calculating how to transport the souvenirs efficiently. He chuckled, “Not too many. Just a few things they’d like.”
“For example, we could get Li Congming…”
Qi Fang picked up a palm-sized shell carving shaped like a skull. With mock seriousness, he said, “Look, Li Congming would surely love this. He works with bones all day, so he must like skulls.”
Shen Yu: “…”
He was somewhat doubtful.
Next, Qi Fang bought a handmade pipe-shaped bubble blower for Qin Xiaosa, two light-up digital photo frames for his elderly relatives, a set of supposedly pure sea salt skincare products for Chen Ke, and several expensive heart-shaped shell necklaces for various friends.
“Is there anything you want to bring back?” Qi Fang asked.
Shen Yu shook his head.
He wasn’t in the habit of buying gifts, and unlike Qi Fang, he didn’t know others’ preferences well.
“Let’s get some things,” Qi Fang insisted. “Some local snacks for your mom, and gifts for your students.”
Shen Yu tried to refuse, but Qi Fang didn’t give him a chance to speak. He tugged Shen Yu along, chattering:
“We’ll visit your mom for New Year’s, right? We can use the gifts then. As for your students, they work so hard on experiments every day. They’d be touched by occasional small gifts and work even more diligently.”
Shen Yu opened his mouth, but the refusal caught in his throat. He hesitated, biting his lip, and remained silent.
This time, Qi Fang was clearly more thoughtful in choosing gifts. He compared prices at several stalls and even picked up some local bargaining phrases. With Shen Yu in tow, they emerged victorious with a substantial haul.
“That should do it,” Qi Fang looked at the things the two people were holding and said, “Any more and we won’t be able to carry it all. Let’s have the hotel send someone to collect these, then we can come back later to browse some more.”
Shen Yu nodded, his gaze lingering on a nearby stall selling bottled sparkling wine.
The display rack was filled with clear bottles of simple fruit sparkling wines. Some were emerald green, others petal pink, and some as red as pigeon blood rubies. Condensation beaded on the chilled bottles, making them glisten enticingly in the sunlight.
Qi Fang was long immune to the allure of alcoholic beverages, but Shen Yu had never tasted alcohol beyond beer-braised duck. His dark eyes held a hint of curiosity.
However, Professor Shen had always been good at restraining himself. He lowered his long lashes, skillfully concealing his interest.
Suddenly, Qi Fang said, “Want to try a glass, Shen Yuyu?”
Shen Yu: “Hmm…”
“Those sparkling wines,” Qi Fang nodded towards the stall Shen Yu had been eyeing. “They look like low-alcohol sweet wines. A little shouldn’t hurt.”
Shen Yu blinked.
“We’re going on a yacht later,” Shen Yu recalled their itinerary, speaking slowly. “Drinking might affect our condition and delay our plans.”
Qi Fang led him to the stall, his lips curving into a smile. “If we can’t go on the yacht today, we’ll go tomorrow. It’s no big deal.”
“Here, try a glass.”
The stall was doing good business, with its colorful sparkling wines attracting many young couples. The vendor was a man in his twenties with dyed green hair, speaking English with a local accent, yet fluently conversing with tourists.
Spotting Shen Yu and Qi Fang, the green-haired young man greeted them enthusiastically. “Hello, hello! What do you want to buy?”
Shen Yu thought for a moment, then pointed to a cherry-flavored sparkling wine.
It looked very sweet.
He liked sweet things.
The green-haired young man skillfully poured the wine into a glass, added a lemon slice and a straw, then handed it to Shen Yu. He then gave another glass to a young white woman waiting nearby.
“Cheers!” he said exuberantly.
Shen Yu took the wine but didn’t drink immediately. Instead, he asked in English, “How much is this glass?”
The green-haired young man rolled his eyes, then smiled at Shen Yu. “Hello, sir. Your glass is 50 dollars.”
He then turned to the woman and said, “Ma’am, yours is 10 dollars. Welcome back anytime.”
Shen Yu: “?”
Even the woman was stunned. She had already taken two sips. She glanced at the green-haired young man, then at Shen Yu and Qi Fang, looking somewhat embarrassed. She stuck out her tongue slightly, quickly paid, and left as if afraid her glass might also increase in price.
Qi Fang frowned. He set down his things, took out his wallet, and placed 10 dollars on the counter. “Here’s your payment. 10 dollars.”
“Sir,” the green-haired young man narrowed his eyes, no longer smiling. “Your glass is 50 dollars.”
Qi Fang put away his wallet and folded his arms. “Why? Wasn’t the identical glass just now 10 dollars?”
Green-haired young man: “That was a gift for the lovely lady.”
“Is that so?” Qi Fang said bluntly. “We’ve been walking around, and other stalls selling sparkling wine usually charge 5 to 10 dollars.”
“My wines are made with secret recipes,” the green-haired young man looked displeased. “I set my own prices. You’ve already drunk my wine. Are you trying to get out of paying?”
He had pegged them as wealthy Eastern tourists, assuming they were easy marks who cared too much about face to haggle over a small sum.
But the green-haired young man had misjudged.
Qi Fang’s greatest skills in life were cooking and managing household finances. And someone good at managing finances would never allow themselves to be swindled.
What followed was a blistering tirade from Qi Fang in rapid-fire English, interspersed with mangled local phrases and Chinese curses. His forceful tone and loud voice drew many passing tourists to stop and watch.
Green-haired young man: “…”
Shen Yu, still holding the sparkling wine: “…”
“Sir, sir… please calm down.” Seeing the growing crowd, the green-haired young man grew anxious, fearing for his business. Reluctantly, he offered a discount, “30 dollars, is that okay?”
Qi Fang: “NO.”
“Fine, 15 dollars! Just go already!”
“No,” Qi Fang started reaching for his wallet again, while holding out his hand to the green-haired young man. “Refund. We’re not drinking it.”
“Give the drink back to him,” Qi Fang told Shen Yu. “We’ll buy from somewhere else.”
Shen Yu placed the glass back on the green-haired young man’s stall.
The green-haired young man was furious. He shouted, “You’ve already drunk it! This is unethical. You’re trying to get my wine for free!”
Qi Fang scoffed, about to speak, when his hand, reaching into his pocket, suddenly touched something. In a moment of carelessness, the object fell out and dropped to the ground.
“Help, I’m having a heart attack, my life is in danger; Help, I’m about to die, it’s an emergency; If not given immediate medical attention, I will die. Please call for an ambulance to take me to the nearest hospital. Location automatically sent to phone number XXXXXX, Contact: Mr. Shen…”
“Help, I’m having a heart attack…”
Everyone: “……”
A sweet, high-pitched female voice came from the fallen emergency device, broadcasting crisp English.
Shen Yu froze for a moment, about to bend down to pick it up, when he suddenly felt someone grip his hand meaningfully. He then saw Qi Fang clutching his chest, slowly collapsing to the ground.
“Oh God, I’m dying.”
Qi Fang wheezed weakly in English: “God as my witness, I’m dying of anger from this young man with green hair like fluorescent flies while buying wine. Please make sure to engrave the cause of death on my tombstone. I want him to suffer eternal guilt…”
The crowd of onlookers suddenly erupted in commotion, while the green-haired young man turned pale with shock.
Shen Yu: “……”
*
Thirty minutes later, kind-hearted onlookers carried Qi Fang back to their hotel on a makeshift stretcher.
As for why they didn’t go to the hospital, it was because Qi Fang had wheezed on the stretcher, “God as my witness! I just left the hospital. I don’t want to return to that hell! Please take me back to my homeland…”
Out of humanitarian principles and pity for a dying man, the crowd brought Qi Fang back to the hotel.
The hotel receptionists were terrified. Their expensive establishment prided itself on attentive guest care. Qi Fang had left upright that morning, yet returned in a horizontal position barely two hours later – wasn’t this an alarming anomaly?
The hotel staff bustled about, finally “reviving” the barely-alive Qi Fang lying on the bed.
“Mr. Shen…” The manager cautiously approached Shen Yu, inquiring politely, “Given your partner’s special condition, do you need us to send him to the nearest hospital for treatment, or perhaps call a famous local private doctor?”
As he spoke, Shen Yu was peeling an apple.
This ordinary task of peeling apples typically fell to caretakers keeping vigil at a patient’s bedside, as if no other action could quite express the bored yet forcefully quiet patience of tending to someone.
Shen Yu, following the few scenes he’d witnessed in hospitals from memory, mimicked the action with the apple the hotel had provided.
But his hands seemed to have lacked any culinary talent from birth.
Though capable of manipulating precise instruments and writing rigorous, beautiful academic reports, he couldn’t peel a complete, unbroken strip of apple skin.
Shen Yu stared at the pockmarked apple he had mangled, silent for a moment before looking up to answer the manager. “…No need for the hospital.”
Qi Fang’s illness was beyond cure now.
Just like… his father had been.
“Mr. Shen, it’s like this…” the manager continued politely:
“Due to Mr. Qi’s special health condition, our hotel needs to allocate more resources to ensure his health and safety, which will cost more than for other guests… Also, there’s an informed consent form regarding Mr. Qi’s health that we need you to sign. If any force majeure events occur, our hotel cannot be held responsible…”
Shen Yu glanced coolly at the all-English consent form, signing at the bottom right without hesitation.
The manager collected the signed form, then cleared his throat, saying, “Now, about the extra care funds for Mr. Qi…”
Shen Yu: “How much?”
The hotel manager thought for a moment and said, “It would be an additional 1000 dollars per day, for purchasing basic ventilators, cardiac resuscitation equipment, and such—”
Shen Yu said decisively, “Fine.”
Qi Fang: “Not fine!”
Shen Yu & Manager: “?”
Shen Yu turned to find Qi Fang sitting up in bed. The pale complexion had long disappeared, his near-death demeanor shed entirely. He argued with the manager in a strong voice:
“We won’t pay extra. You can sign an agreement with me that I’ll crawl out of your hotel before I die, and won’t hold the hotel responsible for anything.”
The manager still looked troubled. “Sir, if anything happens to you in our hotel, it would objectively affect our reputation…”
Qi Fang: “How about this: come sign an agreement with me. If I meet God in your hotel, I’ll compensate you a hundred times the room rate. How’s that?”
The manager considered it briefly. “I’ll have our lawyers review your proposal.”
Qi Fang: “Hmm.”
Shen Yu, who had been silently listening, finally spoke up in Chinese to Qi Fang, “I don’t think this is good.”
Qi Fang squeezed Shen Yu’s hand resting on the bed, comforting him softly. “What’s not good? Don’t worry, you don’t really think I’d… in this place…”
“It’s not that,” Shen Yu said. “I don’t have that much money in my account. If we breach the contract, the compensation would be even more.”
Qi Fang: “…”
Qi Fang: “Shen! Xiao! Yu!”
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